Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Ritual Routines

The other day, while I was in the shower, washing my hair, I got to thinking about personal rituals or routines, the kinds of things that in other discussions with other people would be described as obsessive-compulsive behavior.  And I wondered when we, as humans, began giving everything such a negative connotation.

Why is not only perfectly acceptable, in fact, almost required, for athletes, professional or amateur, to have "winning rituals?"  We all wonder when the "rally caps" will come out in baseball games.  We ask winning football coaches if the team is changing their socks, or participating in "No-Shave November" in order to get into the playoffs. 

Why, then, is it something shameful for the average person have similar rituals or routines?  I am not talking about a true diagnosis of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder; I am discussing average everyday people, doing average, everyday things.  I thought of it as I was washing my hair; what I do first in the shower...always.  I wash my hair, then my body, then my face.  The pattern never varies.  After the shower, I dry my face, then wrap a towel around my hair, after which I dry myself in the same, never varying pattern -- right arm, left arm, front torso, right leg, left leg, back torso.  Many people would consider this obsessive behavior.  But I am sure those same people do the same tasks in a similar pattern.  Everything from tooth brushing to putting on socks and shoes to dish washing has a pattern.  No one person does it in the same pattern, but everyone has their own rituals and routines for performing everyday tasks.

Feline researchers followed cats in rural England for over two years.  I do not remember what they were specifically researching, but they found something completely unexpected.  Everyone knew that cats are creatures of habit and routine, but the researchers were surprised to find how strictly cats adhere to their own personal cat schedules.  The farm cats patrolled what they considered their territory in the same pattern, using the same paths, in the same order, at the same time, within minutes, everyday.  One cat was so regular in his daily patrol that you could literally set a watch to when the cat past a particular post.

I see this same phenomenon, on a much smaller scale, with my own cat.  I know that if it is 10:00 a.m., she will be in the sliding glass door sunning herself.  At 7:00 p.m. you will find her slinking away to a not so hidden hidey-hole (a box with cutout shapes all over that has been lined with lambswool), because she knows that her daily dose of fluid will be coming within the hour.  She sleeps on the foot of my bed for most of the night.  But for some reason, when 4:15 a.m. comes, she gets up, has a bit of a bath and moves to the floor in front of my dresser.  I do not know what marks the time to move from the warm bed to the floor, or how she knows, often within seconds, that it is time to move.  I just know that she does.

Similarly, I know that my right foot needs to have its sock put on before my left foot.  I know that my upper right teeth are the last to be flossed and that the bathtub should be scrubbed in a clockwise direction starting from the middle of the front side.

None of this means I am obsessive or compulsive, it all just means I am human.  And all humans have rituals and routines that ground our days.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Rose Ribbons

Today is December 1, a day which is known as World AIDS Day.
I find it interesting to note that Yahoo and other websites have changed their logo banners to mark the day, with red ribbons and slogans like "Act Aware" but Google, arguably the largest search engine and one of the most visited websites went with a 55th Anniversary of Rosa Parks' refusal to get up as the Google Doodle of the day.  I was so hoping to have a red ribbon woven through the Google logo...

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Similar Differences

day 30 – a dream for the future

Notwithstanding the previous post, I do have dreams for the future.  I want the American Dream:  a home, with a cat, a dog, and a husband who loves me.  I want a good, satisfying job, though it need not necessarily be one that will make me rich.  As long as I can pay for necessities and (frequent) splurges, I am happy.  I do not need to be rich, just comfortable.

Okay, Hallmark sappiness aside, the one thing I would really like to do would be to introduce my husband to all the places I have been and explore more and different places with him.  I am not exactly struck with a case of wanderlust, as I always want to come back home after my travels, but I do want to see the world, experience new places and new cultures, have new adventures, and check out the differences in something as universal as a McDonald’s.  Yes, I do go to McDonald’s while I am traveling. Sometimes because it is cheap and available, but more often because I want to see the differences in something so familiar.  I make no apologies for using McDonald’s as a judge of the similarities and differences in places.  Its very ubiquity and consistency makes it a fair and accurate judge in my mind.  I also like to have familiar dishes or cuisines – like Chinese or Italian favorites – everywhere I travel as well.  Judging interpretations of familiar things is the best way for me to find where the differences lie, and you discover some very nice things that way.  Travel is broadening, but only if you are open to it, and you have to start inside your comfort zone to expand it.

My dream for the future would be to explore my favorite places with my husband.  See them not only through my own eyes, but his as well. 

I am gladly accepting donations for our travel fund ... Perth and Oslo are first up on my wish list for us.

Letting Go of Myself

day 29 – hopes, dreams and plans for the next 365 days

I am quite often day dreaming, and I like to have plans and details worked out well in advance of needing them.  I dislike very much not knowing what to expect.  But this year, my life has been very much in turmoil, waiting on bureaucratic government agencies to make decisions and, once decisions had been made, trying to figure out whet they mean and how to adequately plan in light of the decisions.  It’s been a very frustrating year for me, a natural planner.  As such, I really have no set plans for the next 365 days.  I know what I would like to happen, but even voicing that much seems to make to a contract, give a deadline, and open myself up for disappointment if things cannot materialize the way I hoped.  It’s been a year in flux and I have had to try very hard not to make plans or dream too much.  Until things are settled, I am holding off on planning for the future in any real way, including giving voice to my hopes and dreams.

The World on a String

day 28 – what’s in my handbag/purse

I am so not a typical girly-girl.  Usually I prefer to have only a wallet on a string, which has in it various forms of money (cash – the bill amount varies, as does the coinage, but there is almost always $2.35 in coins in my purse divided so that I can make change in any situation; checks; and credit cards) along with id and customer reward program cards.  My cell phone fits nicely in the coin packet, so usually that is all I have with me at any time.  Occasionally I will drop a lip balm in the coin pocket, but not very often.  I also use my wallet as storage for my receipts until I clean out my purse.  If I am going somewhere fancy and need a little black bag, I will pop in $20-$40 cash, id, a credit card, and lip balm, and hope the bag is big enough to fit my cell phone.  If I know I will need space – either on vacation or someplace where I will have to be waiting, I will pop the wallet on a string into a larger bag, with room for a book, my camera and/or other tourist-necessitated things and small purchases.  I hate to carry more than one bag if I can avoid it, and prefer the smallest bag possible for the situation.

Now if more women’s clothing were made with pockets, I would most likely ditch a purse altogether for everydays and go for a tiny pocket wallet.  I am so not a typical girly-girl.

In Lynn I Trust

day 27 - my worst habit

I think this is the hardest of all the topics in the 30-day blog challenge.  I am not sure which of my many bad habits is the worse.  In one way or another I commit all 7 deadly sins regularly, which pretty much sums up my bad habits in general terms:  Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy, and Pride.  Yep, all my bad habits are included in those.

Often I want things I cannot have; I overindulge in things too often; I hoard things and am not likely to share them; left to my own devices, I am quite lazy and loath to get anything done; I have an anger streak the likes of which you would never expect from someone usually quiet and reserved; Jealousy is my worst enemy, and I cannot count the number of times I have been blinded by the green-eyed monster in my sight; and while I am not too often proud, I am at the least opportune times.

But still, I do not really count any of those as my worst habit.  I really cannot quantify my worst habit.  I am  my own worst judge, and I know it, but even with all the self-depreciation I can muster, I cannot pick my worst habit.  I considered asking my friends and family for suggestions, but then it hit me.  That is my worst habit...not trusting myself when I know myself better than anyone else.  It has been my downfall in more situations than I can count -- from things as big as destroying a friendship to things as small as not posting a well-composed and well-researched response to a blog or message board post.  I know the right answer and I know the right thing to do, but too often I do not trust myself.  Instead, I go seeking advice from others.  And I will feel bad if I do not take their advice, but when I take it, I feel worse for not doing what I thought - no, knew - to be the right thing all along.

Yes, my worst habit is not trusting myself enough to listen to myself and do the right thing.  Now, if only I could figure out how to overcome this...to bring to the dance floor the mousy brown, wallflower girl I know myself to be.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Days Turning Into Weeks

day 26 - your week in detail

This was probably not one of the better weeks to do this experiment.  Being a holiday week, it was all over unusual.  And moreover, it was a 4-day weekend holiday week.  But here goes:

Saturday, November 20
We had a whole bunch of errands and we wanted to see RED with my Dad.  So we planned our errands around the movie time, and a meal at a favorite local restaurant that features braised veal on Saturday.  The day began later than I prefer to get my errands done, but the movie was for 4:20 and we didn’t want to go and come and go and come.  So about 2:00 we headed out to the first stop – Lowe’s for some boxes and packing supplies, as well as light bulbs as we had burned out the last 200 Watt bulb for the living room lamp.  After Lowe’s it was time for dinner, and we had books and intended to take our time.  My Dad had the Saturday veal special, while my brother had a Philly cheesesteak panini and my mother and I split the special autumn menu pork chop feature.  I added a side of mashed sweet potatoes to the dirty rice.  After main courses, we all split an order of the autumn special feature cupcake trio.  I had half a carrot cake cupcake, my mother had half a red velvet cupcake, and my father had half a dark chocolate fudge cupcake.  My brother had half of all three varieties.  After dinner we still had some time to kill before our movies – mom, dad and I saw RED, while my brother saw the new Harry Potter movie, so we sat in the cool shade and read our books.  Before entering the theater, we stopped for snacks where I had a blue raspberry Icee and split a small bag of popcorn (no butter) with Mom and Dad.  They shared a Mr. Pibb to wash down the popcorn.  After the movie was over – our movies ended within 20 minutes of each other, we headed to the next stop on our list, Target, where they were having a sale on laundry detergent and a couple of other things we needed.  Then we hit Walgreen’s drugstore where heat wraps were on sale.  After that it was home for the evening.  We got home just in time to give the cat her daily dose of fluids and to veg out with some tv.

Sunday, November 21
This was to be my day to stay at home, only we had a few leftover errands from the day before.  Mom and my brother had weather-induced headaches, so Dad and I went grocery shopping.  We needed a few things from the grocery, including a turkey for Thanksgiving and some stain remover sticks for the laundry.  First stop was WalMart where I checked first for the turkey I wanted, and being unsuccessful, ran to pick up the stain remover sticks, which I can only find at WalMart.  A very nice lady, seeing as I had only the 3 stain sticks, allowed me to check-out before her.  I hope she got a nice reward sometime for that act of kindness.  Having struck out at WalMart, we went to only grocery store I had not yet visited in my quest for the perfect thanksgiving turkey.  It was Dad’s second time at the store that day, as he had been out early that morning to get milk and butter for breakfast.  But finally, after 5 stores over 7 days, I found exactly the turkey I was looking for, and it was on sale!  With just the four of us, a large turkey is too much.  The guidelines are 1 - 1 ½ pounds of bone-in turkey per person, and ½ - ¾ pounds of boneless turkey per person.  Max that’s 6 pounds for 4 people.  Have you ever searched for a 6-pound turkey?  They do not exist!  Even the bone-in breasts I could find were pushing 8 pounds. I did not want a surplus of turkey to have for leftovers for weeks or months!  Last year, when there was only 3 of us for the holiday meal, we found a small boneless breast roast with skin and dark meat.  All the best parts of the turkey, without being too much.  I knew they were still being produced, because I had checked both Butterball and Honeysuckle White’s websites to be sure I could find what was I looking for.  Finally!  At the 5th grocery store I went to, I was successful.  Armed with such success, we headed home where I was lazy for the rest of the day, working a little on my dearest’s Christmas stocking and watching up some of the tv we had recorded.  It was my brother’s day to do dinner, and he was planning a version of Cincinnati spaghetti, so I had very little to do in that regard.  After dinner, I put away clothes, gave the cat her fluids and called it a day.

Monday, November 22
Work day #1 for the 3-day work week.  As I am wrapping things up, it’s a swing between flat-out busy and struggles to find something to do at the office, and this Monday was no different.  My boss had been out of town at a convention, so I had some things to get submitted for reimbursement, but other than that it was a lot of hurry-up and wait, interspersed with training my replacement.  After work, I was home for some tv, dinner, which was forgettable, and a bit more work on the stocking before giving the cat her fluids and taking a bath.

Tuesday, November 23
Work day #2 began, as all my work days do at 6:00 a.m. when the alarm breaks the sleepy silence and I find the cat to give her her morning pills.  After completing morning ablutions, it was a quick chat with my dearest and then off to work, where I served as fill-in secretary because my work co-conspirator was out that day.  Would have been an easy-peasy day, but for the late afternoon search for a file, and the subsequent fight with a desk.  No matter how hard you try, or how much of a fight you put up, you can never win a battle with a desk, particularly when they employ sneaky corner jump attacks.  Two bruises and a developing knot later, I cried “Uncle” and headed home for the day.  Home brought another forgettable dinner – which is not to say it was not good, jut that I do not remember what it was.  Odd for me, as I usually pay such close attention to meal components.  Tuesday is a good tv night – the programmers are against us and have put nearly everything we watch on Tuesday nights.  And it was all new episodes.  As usual, we started with NCIS and then paused the next show to give the cat her fluids, have showers and complete housework, before picking back up NCIS: Los Angeles.  After watching that through, we started the recording Chopped over and finished that out before bed.

Wednesday, November 24
Work day #3 of the 3-day work week began quietly enough.  It was spent mostly training my replacement on the spreadsheets and charts I have for keeping track of all kinds of things around the office.  The office closed at 3:00 p.m. and I was happy to get out of the madness that much sooner.  The downtown area is always busier than normal around holidays.  My dad was not so lucky and we had to wait until he got home after 6:00 p.m. to go to dinner – though we were only going out for Taco Bell, but in the interim, I worked a bit more on my dearest’s Christmas stocking.  We were home for 7:00 p.m. and left Dad to watch his Wednesday night shows and we relaxed upstairs, giving the cat her fluids and watching some recorded tv there, including the finale of Top Chef Just Desserts.

Thursday, November 25
in detail here

Friday, November 26
None of us are crazy enough to brave Black Friday, and it was a cold, rainy, grey drippy day anyway, so it was just a lazy day at home.  Tv on the couch, leftover Thanksgiving dinner to nibble on and have again for dinner and work on the Christmas stocking.  We had a few errands to run on Saturday, so we prepared for those, but it was really just a lazy day.

On the whole, it was rather easy week.  Not the best week to pick for this task, but, not an outrageously unrepresentative sample either.